looking back ~ 6/9/2010

I’m finally getting my bearings with this whole writing gig – just in time for my son to be home for summer break. This is Day Two, and we’ve survived with no problem, which is quite amazing since I’ve also been sick and my husband has been out of town. Of course that means I haven’t worked on anything – not too surprising for anyone who has been a stay-at-home parent. But what is amazing and thrilling to me is this…for the first time in over 6 months, I don’t seem to care. Sure it could be the over-the-counter meds I’m on. Or maybe, quite possibly, I’ve actually found a modicum of balance.

I won’t get too excited just yet. It really could be the lack of sleep and over-booked summer ahead of me. But I do know I feel much better about my place in this whole adventure.

It’s a glorious feeling to look back and realize that amidst the fears, frustration, and overall time away from my real life, I’ve come out with one book published, another in the throes of editing, a website, a Facebook page, an on-line sales presence (albeit minuscule), and a smattering of reputable contacts for future literary agent/publisher needs. Now I know I’m so far from being done…in fact, I’ve really just begun. However, in the moments when I lament the lack of progress on this 2nd work, I’m reminded of all that I’ve learned.

I know what I loved about my first book and what I would change. I know how to better create my cover and interior format. I know what to expect with the publishing process and marketing afterward. I know how to finagle copyrights. I know what goes into a book signing. And more importantly, I know I want to do it all over again…

I once read that 90% of people claim they would like to write books and only 10% really do it. I believe they are right. Many hold this fantasy dream of being a famous author and penning the Great American Novel, while in reality it’s nothing like that at all. It’s hard to write books (good ones anyway) and even harder to sell them. But again, I don’t care. I don’t just want to write books. I want to publish them. And share them. Whether it be with 2 people or 2 million, it won’t matter. I need to do this because it’s not only who I am (a writer)…it is who I want to be (an author).

This is what I remind myself everytime I miss a few days and think “oh no, I’m going to lose the inspiration or the story will never come back”. Those times happen too often with a young child and full life. But when in the past I would stress and fear that I wouldn’t find my way back, now I just stop, smile, and relax.

I know I’ll get back to it. I have to.

Feeling better about where I’ve been, I’ve set a new daily page goal to get this 2nd work edited for Round One. In fact, it needs to be done before I begin a fabulous family vacation with my wonderful husband and son. Then the draft can sit, relax, and take a break while I do the same. After all, we’ve earned it…

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